Not The Onion: Cow Potty Training

AP: No bull: Scientists potty train cows to use ‘MooLoo’

An excerpt:

Turns out cows can be potty trained as easily as toddlers… 11 out of 16 cows learned to use the “MooLoo” when they had to go…And it took only 15 days to train the young calves.

[Results were] published Monday in the journal Current Biology...Massive amounts of urine waste is a serious environmental issue,…A single cow can produce about 8 gallons (30 liters) of urine a day… toilet training animals makes it easier to manage waste products and reduce greenhouse gas emissions

The researchers mimicked a toddler’s training, putting the cows in the special pen, waiting until they urinated and then giving them a reward: a sweet liquid of mostly molasses… If the cows urinated outside the MooLoo after the initial training, they got a squirt of cold water…

The biggest environmental problem for livestock, though, is the heat-trapping gas methane they emit in belches and flatulence, a significant source of global warming. The cows can’t be trained not to belch or fart, Matthews said: “They would blow up.”

And below from The Onion:

From The Onion