The Onion, 10/1/26: Dude Wipes Introduces New Flushable Khakis

An excerpt:

Personal-cleansing brand Dude Wipes announced Thursday its new line of flushable khakis. “Every guy knows what it’s like to walk around with a load in his slacks, but you don’t have to anymore with these stylish pants you can just tear off and drop in the toilet,” said CEO Sean Riley, adding that the slim-fit chinos were made with a unique sewer- and septic-safe fabric, and came in a variety of manly scents for extra freshness not to be found in traditional khakis, which simply absorb fecal odor.